Hello, my alien lovers!

I'm at the phase of the creative process where I'm doubting myself. Is what I'm writing any good? Will anybody care when the book is finished and published?

I know most writers feel this way, and that being traditionally published wouldn't necessarily ease these particular doubts. But self-publishing means the book's success (mostly) rests with me. I don't have fancy editors or publicists. If I want Perilous to be a success, I'm going to have to make it into one.

That means being really confident about what I'm doing. So, when I doubt, I try to remember that I get to define what success is. I don't need my book to become a bestseller or go viral on social media, although that would be nice.

What matters to me is that the book exists, that at least one person who has never heard of me reads it and becomes so entranced by my world and my zany characters that they subscribe to this newsletter and think to themselves, "Fuck yeah, I want to read more sexy aliens stories!" If I accomplish that, then I can accomplish anything.

Welcome to Chapter 24!

It was a very healing chapter to write. My years of learning de-escalation and conflict resolution tools came in handy.

I'm happy I got to write such a sweet chapter before we dive back into more sexy alien chaos. Enjoy!

lunus 🩷

If you're new to the story, start with Chapter 1

If you missed the last chapter, Previously on Perilous Love Stars

Maple knew legal threats would do little to discourage Peyter from spreading nonsense to his gossip-hungry audience. If she had time, she’d start brainstorming ways to stop him from publishing whatever he got out of Yellow’s escape. But she was too busy sprinting after the teenager. Over-dramatic medical shows and being the boss of hundreds of folks had taught her all about triaging emergencies. The most pressing issue was the glowing-skinned teenager running free for everyone to see. Salvatore’s alienhood was a secret she had to protect for him until he could do so for himself again.

The motel was built near an abandoned train station. Maple stopped when she noticed Yellow sitting on the rusty tracks behind a small building through a broken window. He was playing with the weeds growing between the old wooden ties. She could hear wet sniffs from here. When she joined him, sitting down next to him on the tracks, Maple noticed inky tears drop from his cheeks, leaving a path of clear yellow on his skin and the ground beneath him. She wondered why all the teenagers looked more alien than Salvatore did. Could he modify his appearance when he wasn’t sick? She’d have to wait for him to come back to ask.

For the first time since the divide, she felt the emptiness his absence had created. The past few days had been a rollercoaster of emotions, but she had Salvatore with her. She hadn’t been alone. Now that he was… indisposed, she realized how right she’d been during her declaration to Peyter’s live. She was the only person capable of saving the show. Nothing would stop her.

“I do remember all of us agreeing together that you guys wouldn’t leave the room,” Maple said.

Yellow wiped the corner of his eyes with Salvatore’s hoodie, staining the sleeve. He nodded half-heartedly. “I know, I’m sorry.”

“What happened?” Then, following her intuition, she added, “What did they say?” 

She’d guessed correctly at the way Yellow’s eyes twitched. He immediately looked down, turning away. “How did you know?”

Maple thought about a scene she’d written earlier that year between Evelyn and Romeo, a troubled teenager whose story arc brought him to break into Evelyn’s penthouse at the beginning of season 73rd. Instead of calling the police, which was under Tamara’s villainous control for the first part of the season, Evelyn decides to talk with the thief. Just like Yellow, Romeo was crying. Just like Evelyn, Maple gently held the teenager’s hand. 

Yellow’s skin felt electric. Touching it didn’t hurt like pinching an electric cable. It was vibrant, alive. Alien energy pulsed under Maple’s fingers. “I have my own experience with bullies. I picked up on some tension between you and the other two.”

He glanced at their skin touching. “They think I’m too weak. They say my emotions are  slowing us down.”

“Slowing down what?”

Suddenly, he turned sheepish and took his hand away. “I can’t say.”

Knowing she wouldn’t get that opportunity to ask again when (or if) Salvatore came back, she pressed. “You can’t say, or you won’t because you’re afraid of their reaction?”

Yellow wiped his nose with the back of his hand. Maple tried not to appear too grossed out.  “I don’t want to betray them.”

It was interesting how the teenagers seemed to have their own relationships apart from Salvatore’s. Was the tension between Salvatore’s three parts something he was conscious of, or was it a drastic manifestation of his subconscious? Maple had many questions, but she had to be strategic about the ones she asked. 

“Maybe telling me what’s going on could help us bring back Salvatore?”

From the look he gave her, that was an idea that had crossed his mind, too. Good, maybe that would give Maple some well-needed answers. 

He wasn’t forthcoming and didn’t appear fully convinced yet, so Maple added, “I had a bully in high school when I was around your age. Well… I’m not sure how old you are, but you look like a teenager, so I’m assuming I was the same age.”

He didn’t say anything back, but he was listening, so she continued. 

“It was hard to understand what I did wrong because no matter what I did, my bully had issues with me. I wanted everyone to like me, but I realized it would never happen. All I could do—” She thought about her declaration to Peyter, the messages she received filled with hatred over her tenure as showrunner and #FireMaple. “—actually, all I can do, because it’s still happening today, is be true to who I am and to the values I hold. There will always be people who don’t like you because of who you are or what you represent. If you think you’re doing the right thing, then keep going. Do good and… say fuck to the bullies.”

She left some space for Yellow to process and for herself to admit that she believed in what she was saying. She was doing good, at least the best way she knew how. Lying was bad, but was it that terrible if she lied for the right reasons? Bullies like Peyter weren’t fighting for anything good. They wanted to tear things down. Maple and the rest of her crew were excited to build something inclusive and unique. They weren’t fighting against people or societal change. They were fighting for something. 

“Do good and say fuck to bullies,” he repeated after enough time had passed for Maple to feel a bit awkward by his prolonged silence. “I guess that makes sense.” He paused, fidgeting with the sleeve of the oversized hoodie on his slim frame. “I’m afraid of telling you, but…”

“But what?”

Yellow looked ahead at the vast sky unfolding above their heads. “Maybe there’s a part of Salvatore that knows that only the truth will prevail no matter what. It’s inevitable.”

It felt as if that remark was directed right at Maple. She didn’t want to think about it. She wasn’t hurting anyone with her lies. She was helping.

“I don’t know much about what’s going on because they don’t trust me,” Yellow said. “But Salvatore is sick.”

“Sick? You mean the glowing skin and… you guys?”

“We’ve always divided, since Salvatore was a child. But it’s happening more frequently now. And there’s more…”

She treaded carefully, speaking softly. “More?

“Salvatore is dying.”

Maple took it in stride, not wanting to let too much of her internal turmoil show. “Oh? And does Salvatore know about it?”

Yellow shook his head, dejected. “I don’t know. But I think so. We feel it, so he must be feeling it too.”

Something uncomfortable lodged itself in Maple’s stomach as she admitted to herself that she’d made a mistake by blindly trusting Salvatore. He’d downplayed the gravity of his symptoms when he was, in fact, dying. The realization was so scary that she decided to cut the conversation short.

“Thank you for letting me know. Are you feeling okay walking back to the room and talking to the guys with me?”

He nodded, and Maple felt relieved she wouldn’t have to deal with the consequences of Yellow’s revelations right away. Her number one mission was to bring back Salvatore. She’d deal with his dying, lying ass accordingly after. 

When they reached the parking lot, Peyter was gone. Maple’s empty threats might not stop him from spreading chaos and rumours online, but they worked in getting rid of him. 

Inside the hotel room, they found Red and Blue watching an action movie with the volume maxed out, jumping and screaming on the bed. Earlier, Maple had asked Red to wear the room’s robe so she wouldn’t be exposed to his attributes anymore. He had taken them off and was butt naked again.

She grabbed the remote and turned the screen off.

“Hey!” protested Blue. “We were watching that.”

“Yeah, very uncool and unsexy move,” Red retorted. He took one look at her and Yellow before adding, “Where’s our food? I’m hungry!”

“Me too,” Blue continued. “I’m starving!”

Maple motioned for Yellow to sit on the couch facing the bed. “Everyone, sit down. We’re all going to talk before we eat.”

“Ugh, so lame!” Red continued jumping on the bed. 

Yellow sat down on the couch facing the bed, and after Blue caught Maple’s glare, he followed suit on the side of the bed. 

“Now.” Maple pointed at the other side. Red groaned but sat down after a final jump. “Good,” she clasped her hands in front of her as she sat down next to Yellow on the couch. 

All three teenagers stared at her.

Right, she was the adult. She had to lead this. Just like when she engaged in conflict resolution with her crew, but with three alien teenagers instead. Easy.

WWED—What Would Evelyn Do?

“Right, so,” she clapped her hands. “It’s clear that Yellow has a lot—”

“Wait,” said Yellow. “Who’s ‘Yellow?’”

She widened her eyes at him. “You.” Then she nodded at Blue and Red. “And that’s Blue and Red. I asked if you guys had names. You said you didn’t.”

“So, what? You just decided to call us by the colour of our skin?” Blue protested. “That’s super reductive.”

“Yeah,” Red chimed in enthusiastically, “so reductive.”

She wanted to roll her eyes and scream at the same time. Even Yellow seemed offended. God, what the fuck was her life!

“Fine,” she clapped her hands again. “Kind,” she gestured at Yellow, “Horny,” she sent a vague nod at Red, “and Annoying,” she grinned at Blue.

“Oh, yeah, I’m horny for you baby!” Red shouted, beating his fist on his chest.

“I’m horny too,” mumbled Blue.

“The point is,” Maple raised a voice to quiet any more reactions, “you’re all different. That’s awesome, and it makes you all unique, equal parts of Salvatore. He’s the alien that he is because of you three. When two of you team up to pick on the third, it doesn’t show anything but weakness. You’re at odds with yourselves and with each other. You can’t be strong or steady when you’re not at peace with yourself. You’re always on shaky grounds.”

Was that the reason they split in the first place? Because parts of Salvatore were at war with each other? How tormented was he? He’d always seemed calm and composed under the facade, but maybe she had just been fooled all along. 

“I know that Salvatore is sicker than he’s admitting.”

“Qué?” Red reacted first, followed by a “The fuck?” from Blue. Yellow stared at her with full despair. 

“I also know you can’t survive long term in this current form. Salvatore is what keeps you alive. His disease is also yours. ”

She’d assumed that one, but from the pained silence and glances between the teenagers that followed, Maple knew she’d guessed right. If Salvatore didn’t come back, they’d all die.

“I don’t know if we can heal him,” she said. “I don’t even know what his disease is. Only Salvatore can help me figure that out. I need him to protect me from a killer, and you need him to find a cure.”

WWED—What Would Evelyn Do? She would deliver a couple of practical lines filled with hard-hitting truths. Then, she’d find a way to make it about her and her well-being. Evelyn was a self-obsessed icon.

“We all need Salvatore to survive. So, here’s what we’re going to do. You two,” she pointed at Blue and Red, “are going to tell him,” a wave at Yellow next to her on the couch, “everything you’ve been hiding.” Maple anticipated the backlash and raised her hands in precaution before Blue and Red could react. “Wait—not to me, okay? I’ll leave and let you three talk. Can you do that while I get some food? Instead of fighting each other, why don’t you unite and work on a common goal together? Collaborate instead of fighting. Try something new. Maybe we’ll get somewhere, okay?”

She received lukewarm nods, but by the time she was leaving the room to get food, all three teenagers were sitting together on the bed, whispering and giggling. 

She brought back the sixteen burgers (five for each teenager and one for her) an hour later, and they ate together in front of the latest Betteraves & Betrayals episode. The story focused on Saturno and Evelyn as they continued their investigation to uncover who had tried to kill them during their weekly couple’s massage. Maple recalled writing the episode three months prior, when murder attempts still only existed in her imagination.

They laughed together when Saturno faked a French accent to interview a witness. Yellow cried every time a character had an emotional outburst, which was a lot. Blue and Red argued about the episode’s big argument between Evelyn and Saturno about his refusal to use his alien powers to please her sexually. Saturno claimed it was too dangerous and unpredictable, and that they should focus on finding the killer first. Blue agreed with the decision. Red didn’t. The debate had lasted through the credits. Half an hour later, all three teenagers were asleep. 

From the couch, Maple played old Betteraves & Betrayals episodes—some from Daphne’s era and some from Maple’s. She fell asleep in a hull of nostalgia.

Are Maple Defleuvier and Salvatore Suarez trafficking alien teenagers?

By Peyter Panffer

Following recent reports that Delfeuvier and Suarez were travelling together, speculation had run wild about what the two Betteraves & Betrayals colleagues were scheming. Today, exclusive pictures obtained by Forever Soapy shed some light on the issue.

The pictures show a young person, probably in his teenage years, running away and escaping from a motel room that Defleuvier and Suarez are sharing. The young man has yellow glowing skin, a physical attribute seen in some aliens on Earth. Moments before the shots were taken, Defleuvier harassed one of our brave reporters live, most probably to keep him away from this scoop.

It’s evident that Defleuvier and Suarez are trafficking alien teenagers! Both are jobless now that production on their show is shut down, and it’s not hard to believe they might need cash to finance Defleuvier’s undeniable drug addiction.  “Have you seen her on that live? She’s on something,” writes PP37 on Forever Soapy Forum. “My mom’s a doctor, Maple clearly shows signs of severe addiction and mental decline. #FireMaple!!!”

Should the police be called to stop the alien traffickers? Share your thoughts by taking the poll below!

Forever Soapy, article, May 2XX6