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Weekly chapters are BACK!!!!

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If you missed the last chapter, Previously on Perilous Love Stars

Is this Betteraves & Betrayals’ Swan Song? By Peyter Panffer

Hours before Betteraves & Betrayals’ executive producer Ermett Ersweld gave Forever Soapy the exclusive about Daphne Dutrignon’s triumphant return to the show, leaked documents from Bōøbol’s executives revealed that conversations had been happening for months inside the streamer’s office about cancelling the show.

The damning documents Forever Soapy exclusively obtained point to diminishing audience numbers and growing complaints from the original fanbase about the turn the show has taken since Maple Defleuvier became showrunner, three years prior. After producing over 750 new episodes, it seems the risky bet Bōøbol made with Defleuvier and sexy aliens isn’t paying off. 

Some are already speculating that the announcement of Dutrignon’s return was perfectly timed to coincide with the release of the documents and is nothing more than a desperate PR attempt to salvage the show’s image. Others are already predicting a cancellation in the show’s near future.

Ricky Fox, Humans First MP,  who’s been a particularly outspoken critic of both Defleuvier’s approach to the alien discourse in the show and the inclusion of aliens in Canadian society at large posted a short statement praising Bōøbol for finally “taking the only decision that makes sense to preserve the safety of our kids and stop the alien propaganda the Left has used as a wedge issue to divide Canadians.” His statement continues by stating that “what our country needs right now is content that celebrates our Humanity. Planet Earth is Humanity’s planet. Let’s never forget that.”

When asked about the potential cancellation of Betteraves & Betrayals, one of its stars Marsha Marshweld commented as she was seen leaving a club last night, “I trust the creative team behind the vision the show has… but yeah, it doesn’t look great, eh? I guess I’m going to need a new job.”

While we wait for details about Dutrignon’s grand return to the small screen, we can’t help but wonder if Adele Betterave’s return is the sign the iconic show is on its last breath. 

Note: representatives for Bōøbol, Ersweld, and Defleuvier were reached for comments. No comment was received at the time of publication.  Dutrignon and her representatives have yet to comment on any news related to her return to the show.

Forever Soapy, article, May 2XX6

“Ermett,” Maple said into the phone, lowering her voice so the other people in her office wouldn’t hear her.

Loretta was checking behind the blinds with increased suspicion, Davenport and Cruz were spending a lot of energy not staring at each other, Maurice was biting his nails, and Salvatore was probably standing right behind her, looking as handsome as ever. She was glad she couldn’t see him. He was absurdly distracting.

Maple cleared her throat which had developed a tendency to close when she thought about Salvatore too much. “Ermett, pick up your phone. Send me a text, respond to my emails—just do something so I know you’re alive and not dead at the bottom of a ravine somewhere.”

She was joking (mostly). She wasn’t big on fretting about his whereabouts, but just like hers did, Ermett’s life revolved around his job. Ersweld Included was a small family business. Created by Ermett’s grandfather, the company also produced Christmas movies and slasher films. Betteraves & Betrayals had been their first major success and had kept their lights on for over five decades. The news of the company’s flagship show’s pending cancellation was something Ermett would want to know as soon as possible. Usually, he was the first one to hear about this kind of news. The fact he still hadn’t reached out to Maple was more unsettling than she allowed herself to feel. She couldn’t run a show and fight off sabotage if she was losing her mind over Ermett and what Forever Soapy had published. She had a fucking job to do.

“Who else knows about the sabotage?” Maple asked, turning back to the room after sliding the phone into her back pocket.

“Everyone who knows is in this room,” Cruz said.

“Okay, I want it to stay that way for now,” Maple announced, getting everyone’s agreement. She motioned at today’s call sheet, pinned on one of the numerous corkboards living in her office. “Maurice, Cruz, I want you to figure out how to shift today’s schedule with minimal delays. Let’s move all the scenes with Saturno to later in the day and shoot the ones he’s not in for now.” Her line producer and chief electrician promptly nodded. “Loretta, Davenport, get the rest of the cast and extras ready for the day. We don’t know how long we’re going to be delayed, I want to be ready to shoot as soon as we figure it out.” She turned sharply to face Cruz. “Tell the director to follow your lead and ask the PAs to get a new call sheet out for everyone within an hour. If anyone asks what’s going on and why we’re moving stuff around, just say Ermet asked for it.” If the producer wasn’t going to show, she would use it to her advantage.

Maple took a moment to pause and gather her breath and thoughts. She’d love to crawl under a desk and devise a better plan but they were all staring at her, waiting for her to prove why she was in charge. 

She gave the room one nod before clapping her hands together. “Let’s go, folks! We have a show to make.”

When everyone but Salvatore had left the room, Maple felt his heavy gaze on her back. She’d managed not to make eye contact so far. Whatever was going on with him and his secrets, she couldn’t get distracted. As intriguing as the strange dynamic Salvatore had created between them was, the show was in crisis. That was Maple’s priority from now on. 

“What about you and me?” Salvatore’s voice rumbled out from behind her. 

“I need to look into the wig theft, ” she said, brainstorming activities she could do to get away from him. The carnal pull between them was a problem that needed mitigation for now until she could look at it in more depth. “I guess you can hang in your changing room until we figure it out?”

“I better stay with you.”

She turned to look at him. “Why?”

She hadn’t meant it to sound so virulent. The sudden interest Salvatore had taken in her was disarming and untimely. Today was not the day for her employee to play bodyguard.

He smiled, unperturbed.  “Two pairs of eyes are better than one, don’t you think? Especially since we’re trying to catch a thief.”

He wasn’t wrong. Maple thought about other reasons she could devise not to spend more time alone with the sexy superstar. She couldn’t think of any, and when the door opened to reveal Semoule, she was almost glad to see the PA.

“Cruz said you might need help,” Semoule said with the same nonchalance that seemed to inhabit him at all times. “About a wig or something? He said not to tell anyone else.”

Salvatore cleared his throat and lost his smile. “We got it covered—”

“Great!” Maple cut him off with as much grace as an avalanche. “Salvatore was just saying how an additional pair of eyes would be beneficial. Let’s go!”

Before anyone could protest or ask questions she stormed out of the room. It was only when Maple was down the stairs with Salvatore and Semoule on her toes that she remembered the envelope security had left on her desk. 

“I forgot something,” she said, ignoring Salvatore’s eyes. “I’ll meet you there.”

She didn’t wait for their response and climbed the stairs to her office two at a time. She opened the door and rushed to her desk.

The envelope was gone.